Sunday, November 17, 2013

Star Wars Wars

So the other day I was approached with a question I didn't realize would be so difficult to answer. Most questions are stoopid easy. Whats your favorite food? Burgers. Next. Whats your favorite kind of music? Hip hop/rap. DUH. Next. Whats your favorite upper chest workout aside from incline bench? Incline straight-arm overhead dumbell extensions. However, this question didn't come so easy...

Who is your favorite Star Wars character?

Mind blown. How do you answer that question. Immediately, I wanted to break this down to make it easier. Like, favorite character from the Republic and from the Empire. Or favorite from the original 3 and favorite from the new 3. But the question was strictly 1 favorite through all of Star Wars aside from the extracurricular Star Wars Universe.

So here is my attempt at the, in numerical order, top 5 Star Wars characters.

5.
 Darth Sidious
   This character edged out quite a few potential #5's. It could've been Han Solo. Could've been Darth Maul. I chose DS to make this list because of his role in the entire Star Wars universe. Maybe the only reason there is a Star Wars series. He was, as Palpatine, the final Supreme Chancellor of the the Republic. He then revealed himself as DS and became the first Emperor of the Galactic Empire. He turned Anakin into Darth Vader. He was clever, cunning, and quite the piece of eye candy for those of you who are into wrinkly, decaying sith lords. So most of you.

 "You will devote yourself to the idea of domination"


4.
Yoda
   In the same vein DS was the reason there was a Galactic Empire that overthrew the republic, Yoda was a big cause of the fall of the Empire. If it weren't for Yoda, Luke would have never learned how to harness and hone his Force potential and defeat his father, Vader. Yoda was Grandmaster on the Jedi council and was dope to watch fight. Like, I don't even know how anyone could go 1v1 in a lightsabe battle. Dude was flipping everywhere. He's Star Wars's Oddjob...if you get that reference anyway. Plus, he was full of amazing quotes and interesting word placement. Perennial top 5 choice right here.

 "Wars not make someone great"

3.
 
Boba Fett
   Arguably way more bad-ass than his dad, Jango, even though Jango is a way better name. Boba. What a stupid ass name. Guarantee he became a bounty hunter, not because of the spite he had for his dad's death, but because he wanted to kill everyone who made fun of his stupid ass name. Anyway, this guy killed/captured/probably killed people for a living. Already dope. He is the best at what he does and that in itself is admirable. Plus, anybody who could fly the Slave I is worth a top spot. That ship looks impractical.

"Get him, dad, get him. Fire!"

2.
  Natalie Port...er, Padme Amidala
   I know this isn't Padme, but I really like this picture of Natalie Portman so I used it. Also, it's my blog. I could've put a picture of a guy sleeping a hamburger if I wanted to so shut up. As a matter of fact,


  SEE THAT!?!?!? MY BLOG.

   Anyway, I chose Padme because she is the ultimate bad ass female. She's sexy, smart, powerful, and brave. She stayed to help fight the Empire even though she WAS PREGNANT. She cared for her people and wanted to protect them at any cost. Plus, she gave birth to the character who killed the most powerful force sensitive character in the movies. That's cool. Her vagina couldn't handle giving birth to those kids so she died. Luke and Leia killed their mom. THATS why they're nowhere near this list.

"My only wish is that Sam Thomas will marry me so we can eskimo kiss whenever I want."

 1.
 Mace Windu
   The dude of all of the Star Wars movies and my number #1 favorite character. Served on the Jedi Council. Fought the Empire. The only reason HE didn't stop the rise of the Empire is because ANKIN SKYWALKER IS A HUGE DICK!!!! Either way, he killed Jango Fett by cutting his head off. Haha. Idk what Boba did with dad's head when he picked up his helmet, but I bet he cried a lot. Nice job, Mace. Purple is my favorite color and he is the only Star Wars character to have a purple lightsaber. He is easily the coolest Korunnai I can think of. Hats off to you, Mace.

"May the Force be with us all"

Agree with my top pick? Who is your favorite character?

   

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